Just another word.

I woke up again, then fell, then really woke up from my sin.
------------------------------------------------------------

"His divinity is equal to the Father, His humanity is submissive to the Father"

-by a d'na officer.

I couldn't really understand why man are sometimes so fickle, somehow unfaithful. I understand the part where lust is a young man's battle, but I don't understand why, given the red lights, warnings, reminders, memories of the past, I still somehow lose it.

Its answer remains an unknown to me till I was impressed by the Holy Spirit where the above quote flash through my mind and stay in it. My heart of wonder, satisfied.

It's not about my strength or my ability. Not that those who failed are weaker. I realised soon after, it's because my will of taking control, instead of letting Him to. I took over the authority, manage it, trying to handle it with my own hands. He never hold back from us, our freedom of freewill each human has. But He also given us the knowledge of what's right and what's wrong, I supposed it's called conscience. It became more and more blunt as we dismiss it time after time. But the gift of the Holy Spirit sharpens it, as we come with a humble heart, as we repent.

I know full well, if I were called to marriage, God certainly provide. I don't have to do what I did, imagine, seek, anxious, worry, fantasised and what's worst that you could think of. Only if, I were submissive. Surely the Creator of universe and the One who promises perfect love have a perfect plan for us. Then it sums up to this question: who can take care of my life better, more fruitful? God or me?

Christ was a perfect example, as human, He faced much temptation as well, but tempted in everyway, still sinlessly paid the sin of the people He created and loved. Why? I believed it's the word - submissive.

This morning, as many other, I have heard many times of the phrase "budaya Barat", it was used so many times in such context that I don't know how many people have the impression that: western culture = bad. Well, I beg to differ. Where does the practice of Father's and Mother's Day started from, where does Children's Day started from? Abraham Lincoln was from the West. Mother Teresa as well. I do not think the problem lies with geography, nor because of the difference in culture, but he similarities of man's desire for evil - self-centredness.

We know full well we need authority over us, but we go against it. Laws, companies, school, even parents. But we want our ways.

As to question of whether the westerners are righfully accused, I supposed you've the answer. By both history and present times.

kay, sidetrack. keep it up. God bless, take care.

better go study my physics now, love yea. (:

Before trial.

the feeling of stepping into the field battling again, the battle of honesty and of one's integrity, discipline for commitment, besides the stacks of book and inks. [gulp] most likely this will be my last blog before SPM trial. wow. [you must be wondering why am I so free =.=]

nah, I couldn't believe and stand in amazement of the story of life tht my God have brought me to this far. From the fear of loneliness, dirty sins, to hear Him speaking forgiveness personally, to each challenges that He constantly brought me through in victory in these few years..

I'm not a good student or what. God has been real good to me. And to me, if anyone of you can remember about last year co-curricular day, with my terrible voice and commands, getting a runners-up was more than just a miracle to me. And I cannot remember by now, how many times that I faced great challenge before each evnt that I was involved in, just take the BK Quiz two weeks ago as an example, yea, partnering with my friend from another school whom I've never met, sick throughout the whole trip, and to those who knows, God has been my strength when I'm weak!

and last week, it has been a struggle for me, with pride, with myself. While I was still wondering what is Dr. Chuah's message of God of our struggle, I suddenly was stunned of it: Isn't it what I've been facing all these while? I like the picture he's given: see how the butterfly struggle through the cocoon and fly. If the cocoon is cut open to ease the butterfly's struggle, it 'll never fly, it'll be so swollen that it will just crawl for the rest of its life. And the story of Jacob., God graciously touched him and made him realise who he is.

I was impressed again by the story of the lost sheep, the lost coin and the lost son. Am I not the lost sheep that wander at the edge of the cliff? Am I not the lost coin or the lost son, that was dead but no alive? Indeed, God is the one who's waiting, who is faithful enough to put down His robe and to give us the ring of promise, to search high and low for the unfaithful me, and to bring me back again to the circle of grace.

And to think about my family. How many wars was resolved in prayer? How many times, God has turned things out in peace?

And the exam period, when I chose to trust Him and no one else, and nothing else, how much He blessed me with? Indeed, to God be all glory!!

Just to reminisce Uncle Ch'ng (our youth advisor) 's story of peer pressure, it was a great story that I think it's worth sharing: there was this girl [I couldn't remember the name], who refuse to lower her principles. So she faced much mocking, much teasing and became a subject of humiliation by other girls in a party. With all integrity, she stood and said:

"At any moment from now, I can go to the back of any car and be like what you
are; but at anytime from now to the end of your life, you can never be what I
am."

This word have been much of my encouragement to face pressure of all kinds. And you too will take a moment of thought for this.

In Christ alone, my hope is found, here in the blood of Christ I stand. ~